DJ Khaled puts together one of the most impressive tracklists ever for “Khaled Khaled.”

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TOP 5

 

HONORABLE MENTION. WE GOING CRAZY

Who the hell knew that H.E.R. was the fourth member of Migos?

I want to hear “We Going Crazy” in a nightclub after 2 AM when the Christians get enough confidence to dance with the Demons. The song is powered by a flipped version of Mandrill’s “Children of the Sun” beat. Over the beat, H.E.R. hits us with a vocal performance that should make your buzz turn into a very drunk buzz. She also says a few things that I would expect a pimp to say (Did she just ask where her money was?). As for Migos, they do a great job of hyping H.E.R. up throughout the song and also hitting us with verses that are filled with stupendous flows and lyrics that would galvanize hard-working dope boys.

 

 

5. I DID IT

“I Did It” literally features all of the hottest rappers in the game right now.

I f**king love how edgy, dynamic, and motivational “I Did It” sounds. Since the song features a beat that mixes electrifying rock vibes with hard-hitting rap vibes, you get a rebellious hook by Post Malone, a pretty confrontational verse by Megan Thee Stallion, a sly but galvanizing verse by Lil Baby, and a boasty verse by DaBaby.

“I Did It” is going to make you finally get enough confidence to put together that desk that has been sitting in its box for months (That’s how motivational the song is).

 

 

4. BODY IN MOTION

Dope boys aren’t going to f**k with “Body In Motion,” but music lovers will.

“Body In Motion” was probably produced by Fabio. The song features this sexy-ass beat that makes me want to watch a dime piece eat a strawberry off her belly button. While Bryson Tiller acquiesces to the vibes of the beat by hitting us with one of his most romantic performances to date (Dude sounds like he just finished eating a McMolly), both Lil Baby and Roddy Ricch come across as regular-degular trappers that know what to do when they find a baddie that is down to do s**t that’s strange for pieces change.

 

 

3. I CAN HAVE IT ALL

You get classic Meek Mill in “I Can Have It All.”

As soon as I heard, “I can feel it in the air,” I shivered as if I was suffering from symptoms from my second COVID shot all over again. My thinking was that if you give Meek Mill Beanie Sigel’s “I Feel It” beat, he would absolutely kill s**t. Thankfully, he does just that. On his way too short/riveting verse, he sounds like a dude that became a rascal because of all of the different horrors he saw during his come-up. As for both H.E.R. and Bryson Tiller, they add some great (But not necessarily needed) vocals to the song, making it much more stirring.

 

 

 

2. SORRY NOT SORRY

Two rivals that became friends, Jay-Z and Nas, do light work in “Sorry Not Sorry.”

This is probably an unpopular take, but I don’t love Nas and Jay-Z’s 2-3 collaborations from the past (Let’s be real, “Black Republicans” was very close to mid)… I also don’t love “Sorry Not Sorry” (The song is kind of boring), but I do respect all of the wisdom, the nostalgic feelings, the effortless flows, the controversial takes, and the grown man swag that the two rappers bless us with in the song. I also like how Beyoncé (Who is not credited in the song) flexes her boss status by hopping on only 10 seconds of the song (She probably laid her vocals down during one of her lunch breaks).

This “Sorry Not Sorry” song belongs on the Calm app.

 

 

1. POPSTAR

Why aren’t people mentioning that Drake absolutely went ham, cheese, and chipotle ranch on “Popstar” enough?

“Popstar” is powered by a beat that is meaner than your mother when she finds out that you have been using the lunch money that she’s been giving you these last couple of weeks on Very Fine drinks. Over it, Drake cockily raps about messy chicks calling his phone, his intentions of running 2020, and his trill-ass homies. He also raps about wanting a slow death (Let’s not go there, Drake). While I f**k with how introspective the self-proclaimed 6GOD sounds in the song, I think it’s his nonchalant demeanor that catches my attention the most (He sounds like an unbothered pimp in the song).

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SONG BY SONG BREAKDOWN

1. THANKFUL (3/5)

2. EVERY CHANCE (3/5)

3. BIG PAPER (3/5)

4. WE GOING CRAZY (4/5)

5. I DID IT (4/5)

6. LET IT GO (3/5)

7. BODY IN MOTION (4/5)

8. POPSTAR (4/5)

9. THIS IS MY YEAR (3/5)

10. SORRY NOT SORRY (3/5)

11. JUST BE (3/5)

12. I CAN HAVE IT ALL (4/5)

13. GREECE (4/5)

14. WHERE YOU COME FROM (3/5)

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RGM RATING

(D+)

 

Do you know why DJ Khaled’s albums never get praised? Because it never lives up to the lofty expectations that we have to put on it. Folks, when you have an album featuring Jay-Z, Nas, Beyoncé, Justin Timberlake, Justin Bieber, Cardi B, DaBaby, Lil Baby, Roddy RIcch, Puff Daddy, Big Sean, Rick Ross, Bryson Tiller, Migos (All of them, too), Post Malone, Megan Thee Stallion, H.E.R., Lil Wayne, and f**king Drake twice, that s**t better be greater than Princess Zelda’s twerking skills… Unfortunately, Khaled Khaled is not better than Princess Zelda’s twerking skills.

I think styles that don’t match were forced together way too much, too many songs are gimmicky, the most anticipated songs are boring, and there are too many Lil Baby songs on Khaled Khaled. Personally, I love it when DJ Khaled swings for hits; not when he swings for shock value. With that being said, the album does have several songs that are impactful and tons of notable rap verses. All in all, I don’t love Khaled Khaled, but I do applaud DJ Khaled’s ability to get so many A-list rappers together for a project.